Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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