I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
