I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
