Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize