Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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