New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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