whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
