my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
