I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
