no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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