How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
