HIV tests are more positive than that guy
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
