I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
