We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Randomize
