You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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