me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
