I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize