No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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