I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm lost and stupid without you.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
