On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
