will power is for people who don't want to get laid
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I got her a Nickelback box set.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
