I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
