I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
The police scanner is talking about you again....
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
