the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
