i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
