If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize