he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
