btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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