Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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