I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
whose parrot is this?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
