Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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