We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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