There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize