They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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