This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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