Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize