O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
