I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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