Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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