Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
