if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
