Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
