i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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