Ambien. No doubt about it.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My ATM looks so different sober.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
