Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize