So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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