Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
