Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Randomize
