You smell like a Billy Joel song
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize