I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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