it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
