I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
